The Siamese Satirist: Rohingya refugees consider careers in sports and entertainment to gain Thai middle-class support

As the world’s most persecuted minority group, having faced exile and genocide at the hands of the Myanmar government, Rohingya communal leaders told The Siamese Satirist on Thursday they were baffled by the support of Thai elites for the #BlackLivesMatter movement.

“They are organizing a protest on Sunday for the African-Americans in Bangkok,” said Rahman Hlaw Wen, a communal leader. “It has nearly 1,000 people signing up, we can’t even get a Facebook post! America is THOUSANDS of miles away, we are right next door!”

Rahman said, as a result, leaders in his community are planning for Rohingyas to take starring roles in popular sports and TV shows to woo the mercurial interests of the Thais.

“We’ve already asked the United Nations to build basketball courts in the refugee camps so that we can train.,” he said.

“We’re also planning on being on popular films that highlight stereotypical depictions of us rather than treat us three-dimensional human beings”

Rahman said that the prevalence of African Americans celebrities was the only logical explanation for why the Thai middle class seemed so invested.

“When we were getting raped and murdered by the Myanmar government, many Thais took to social media to ask why they should care about our plight when they had their own problems,” said Rahman.

“I mean, those problems haven’t gone away so why do they give a shit about Black Lives Matter now? Clearly it must be celebrities and sports, otherwise, they’re just shitty people and we hope that is not true.”

Rahman also said he was reaching out the hill tribes of Thailand, the thousands of refugees in camps around Thailand, and the migrant workers of Thailand who face constant discrimination, extrajudicial killing and persecution.

“We figured out the formula! So we’re going to tell those minorities also ignored by the Thais to join popular sports and entertainment so they can get their own public protests too,” he said. “I mean, shit, we might feel worse for them. Those people actually live in Thailand and get ignored.”

.

.

.

.

[This is Fake News. Because some people fail to spot the difference between reality and satire, this disclaimer is necessary.]

Advertisement -

COVID-19

Thailand finds 230 coronavirus cases in the past 24 hours

Thailand’s government said on Saturday that it had found 230 new coronavirus cases in the past 24...
Advertisement -
Advertisement -

Latest article

Two arrested after weekend Bangkok protests

Two people were arrested Saturday for protesting against the government’s use of the lese-majeste law, at the Victory Monument intersection in downtown...

Thailand finds 230 coronavirus cases in the past 24 hours

Thailand’s government said on Saturday that it had found 230 new coronavirus cases in the past 24 hours.Of...

Growth forecast overly optimistic, Bank of Thailand warns

The latest outbreak of Covid-19 in Thailand could pull economic growth lower than the 3.2 per cent estimated by the government for...

PM: Legalized gambling could be on the cards to curb Covid-19 spread

Prime Minister Prayut Chan-ocha said on Friday that he is open to the idea of legal gambling venues in Thailand, to help...

BTS extension fee could soar to 158 baht over talks delay, governor warns

The fare to ride the Green Line extension of Bangkok’s BTS Skytrain could more than double to 158 baht, the city governor...

Bangkok golf course closed after caddy tests Covid-positive

Navatanee Golf Course was closed for three days after a caddy has been infected with the coronavirus, it said Friday.